Long ago, when the seas were young, and the land was undiscovered, there was a Titan. His name was Ulkor, and he had a huge mustache, showing how manly he was. He was a ruthless killer, slaying men, women and children. His fleets of blood thirsty vikings made fearsome raids on the mainland. As soon as you heard his war drums, your life was forfeit. He would find you, and ue your skull as a cup to drink his brew (Which was the best around).He weilded a hammer made from the roots of a mountain, and he could summon storms at a whim.One day, he got really really super pissed at this little kid who dropped a spoon, and he ripped out his own spine.
In the distance, a wicked drum solo could be heard, the type of legend. From the wreckage of the spine crawled a new god. This god had a full blown beard, so you knew he was very manly. On his hips were two drum sticks of thunder, and he wielded a massive war-hammer of pure gold.
This new god, was Ulkor the Drunk.
Ulkor is the god of storms, drums, and viking stuff. He can belch fire, and his drum solos call down thunder. He can throw his solid gold war-hammer with unerring accuracy, and summon it back, like a freaking boomerang.
